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Harbans' Top 12 tips to create a Modern Family

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  1. Always wear a tie and clean shirt if you are the head of the family, preferably with a nice knitted sleeveless jumper. (When buying a jacket, choose one with plenty of pockets).
  2. Always have a small notepad and a pen handy - for making lists
  3. Teach your children to speak English at all times - even if their mother doesn't understand them
  4. Watch the Six O'Clock News from the BBC every day - be sure to 'tut' loudly when there is bad news.
  5. Change into comfy slippers when home from work
  6. Always end each sentence with 'Please' or 'Thank You' when out and about and offer to help people with their trolleys whilst shopping
  7. Make sure you watch the Queen's Speech on Christmas Day
  8. Learn to write poetry (it doesn't have to be good)
  9. Always offer the postman a cup of tea - even if he looks busy
  10. If you live with your landlady, remove your shoes when walking up the stairs late at night
  11. Avoid eating garlic or onion before meeting English people
  12. When shaking hands with people, look into their eyes and smile - Make sure your smile reaches your eyes, even if you're unhappy

And just don't do the 'Aunty-Shaanti Thing' if you want to be modern!


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